Hands

I haven't posted in a while for two reasons.  The first reason is that Miss M had her tonsils and adenoids removed a few weeks ago, and things have been crazy around her during her recovery.  (She is finally almost back to normal, and we had our first full school day today...yippee!)  The second reason is that I just haven't felt like I had anything useful or important to say.  Winter is bleak and boring (especially with no snow here in the mid west.)  School seems bleak and boring.  I know this can be a common feeling among homeschoolers in February.  (I know when I was in a "real" school setting, we got the same cabin fever feelings.)

But today as we were finally doing school, an inspiration came to me, and I knew I finally had something to share.  I was watching my two beautiful children as they worked and played, and I really focused in on their hands.  My little ones were working so hard with their hands today.  Miss M was busy writing a story about having her tonsils removed.  Mr. J was very busy playing with his construction set.  I thought about how different their hands are.  Not in terms of appearance, but in terms of how they use their hands.

Miss M's hands are happy when they are creating, dancing, acting, painting, hugging, and helping.  Her hands are happiest when they are touching an animal's fur.  Mr. J's hands are happy when they are sorting, classifying, moving, building, exploring, and organizing.  His hands are happiest when they are overflowing with construction vehicles. Our creator knew what he was doing when he created these precious little hands.

Thinking of hands reminded me of JJ Heller's song "Your Hands."  It is one of my all-time favorite songs, and a wonderful reminder that even during the bleak winter months, even when I feel like I'm not doing a great job at the whole mom thing, even on my most stressful days, God is holding me in His hands.  And that is enough. Every single day.

Pressure

A couple of weeks ago, Miss M confided in me that she felt like I was pressuring her too much.  My first instinct was to tell her that I wasn't pressuring her.  I was just asking her to get her work done.  (She tends to need some extra motivation on some days.)  But I tried to really listen to what she was telling me, and I came to the conclusion that even if I don't need to back off on my daily work "pressure", I might need to examine my stress level and how that might be coming out during the day.  I realized that I feel pressured.  By society, by my own expectations, by the feeling that I'm not doing a good enough job.  I am letting myself feel pressured, and that is probably not a good thing.  I cannot instantly fix this problem.  But being aware of it is a good first step.  I want my kids to work hard (even if that means sometimes working on things they'd rather not.)  But I don't want my insecurities and self-imposed pressures to cause them to feel that learning isn't fun or that perfection is our goal.  

Besides committing this issue to prayer, I have also been seeking out some creative ideas for our classroom to help our day go more smoothly.  I came across the idea of Work Boxes and modified the idea for us. I put letter-sized stacking trays above our work area.  (These fit perfectly because of the slanted ceiling.)  Each tray can hold one assignment that needs to be finished by Miss M.  From left to right, I have a set of four trays, then a "break" card, then two more trays, then a "lunch" card, then two more trays, then a "break" card, and then two more trays.  In each section, Miss M can choose the order in which she wants to complete the assignments.  This helps break everything up, but it also puts the decision partially into Miss M's hands.  The hope is that Miss M will feel some more control so we spend less time "discussing" what subject to complete next.  It also gives her a visual when she first comes into the room.  She knows exactly how much work she needs to complete for the day.  

The other items I added to our system are two posters with Velcro circles and small pictures printed on card stock.  The poster on the left tells Miss M what she needs to complete for the day.  As she completes the assignments, she can move the appropriate subject cards to the poster on the right.  This is another visual way for her to keep track of her work on her own.  

So far the system seems to be working nicely.  I will post updates to the system as we adapt and change it.

By the way, Miss M's My Place in the World idea came from here.

The Marathon

We lost nearly the whole month of December.  Both kids had upper respiratory infections for two weeks with secondary infections that followed (bronchitis for Miss M and an ear infection for Mr. J.)  Then they were feeling better the week before Christmas but we were swamped getting presents wrapped, cookies made, packing for Grandma's, etc.  Then they both had the stomach flu.  It seemed like everything was working against us in December.  So, we had an unplanned break.  And when I start to feel guilty about how little work we actually got done, I remind myself that it's a marathon, not a sprint.  And God has given us the gift of a new year, a clean slate, a chance to start over.  I am so thankful for that daily blessing, not just on January 1st.  So, tonight I have cleaned up the classroom, planned out the week, put up a fresh calendar, and I'm ready for our school year to continue.  Let's hope the kids are just as excited in the morning.

And here is proof that we did get a little bit of work done in December...

Sick Week

We had a sick day week.  Two sneezes on Sunday afternoon turned into a terrible barking cough by Monday afternoon for Miss M.  My kids are not often sick, but the cough, fever, lost voice and aches kept her on the couch for three full days, and we finally took her into the doctor.  Viral infection and bronchitis.  Fun.  That sounds sarcastic, but it really hasn't been bad.  Our days have been spent in jammies, reading on the couch, not stressing about missing school.  Miss M slept fourteen hours straight last night!  She couldn't have done that if I'd  had to wake her up for school.  So it hasn't been a bad week at all (besides my little girl feeling lousy).  I'm even hoping that tomorrow she'll feel well enough to get some school work done!

Fearfully and Wonderfully Made!

I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  Wonderful are your works; my soul knows if very well.   ~Psalm 139:14     

I have a bad-mom confession.  I occasionally compare my children to each other.  I sometimes compare them to other children.  I see their faults and short-comings more often than I like.  I become frustrated when my daughter talks too much or wants to chat with strangers when we're in a hurry.  (She is social like her dad.)  And I recently said to my husband, "You realize that Mr. J has all of our worst personality characteristics?"  Doesn't like to be hugged?  That's from me.  Can hold a piece of chewed food in his mouth for hours if he doesn't want to swallow it?  That's from my husband.  Picky eater?  That's from me.   Quick to be frustrated?  That's from me.  Stubborn?  Well, that's probably from both of us.  My point is that I  sometimes have these terrible thoughts, and I have been convicted.  I was reading Psalm 139 and realized that comparing, looking for the negatives, or nit-picking is probably a slap in the face to God.  HE made these beautiful and unique children.  Just the way HE wanted.  It is only my job to love them and to help guide them as they grow.  Not shape them into something I want or try to will away their "bad habits" or more challenging personality traits.

So, this week, I spent more time looking for the positives.  I saw Mr. J putting together twelve-piece puzzles by himself.  I didn't even know he could do that!  I watched him easily finish patterns without blinking an eye.  Miss M performed in a local Nutcracker production and was amazing!  She even made a "cast list" for us to perform a small Nativity show for Grandma and Grandpa and was already planning costumes and dialogue.  Will Mr. J ever be on stage?  Not likely.  Will he learn to chew and swallow food in a timely manner?  I hope so.  Will Miss M be an engineer?  Probably not.  Will she learn that sometimes it's best to say nothing at all?  I hope so.  But I will love them no matter what they do in life, no matter what their personality quirks are, and I will continue to praise God for giving me such fearfully and wonderfully made children!

Giving Thanks

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for that is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.  1 Thessalonians 5:16

Miss M unknowingly caught my attention this week when she was having some free art time and misspelled the card she was making.  I'm so used to seeing the word "Thanksgiving" that I often gloss over the true meaning, even at this time of year.  But when I read what she had accidentally written, I immediately asked myself, "For what have I GIVEN thanks?"  I asked myself if I was giving God thanks for everything or just the things that I liked?  It's easy to thank God for all the good things in life.  Thankfulness for the good stuff rolls off our tongues so easily.  And grumbling rolls off the tongue just as easily.  Probably more easily some days. 

Am I thankful for the times when my children are at each other's throats?  No. 

Am I thankful for the times I'm disorganized and can't seem to keep on top of any single project I've started?  No. 

Am I thankful when my car won't start and we're late getting somewhere?  No. 

Am I thankful for children who wake me up in the middle of the night for various reasons, keeping me from getting a full night's sleep?  For several weeks?!?  No. 

Am I thankful for expensive medical tests and doctor's visits that are straining the budget to the breaking point?  No. 

Should I be thankful for all of these things?  YES!  I should be thankful my children are healthy enough to fight with each other.  I should be thankful that God has everything under control, even when I don't (and also that there will be no paperwork in heaven.)  I should be thankful that I even have a car to drive.  I should be thankful that my children like to snuggle with me, even if it's in the middle of the night.  I should be thankful I live in a country where medical care is so accessible. 

Because I am a sinner, I know that most days I'll probably still grumble more than I'll rejoice, but I pray God will continue to help me see the areas of my life where I've given thanks and the areas where I still need to. 

We can learn like this...

or like this...

or like this...

  
Miss M is as bright as they come (this is my professional and motherly opinion), but she has had her learning struggles like many children do.  Reading has been a frustrating challenge for her. Timed fact tests in math send her into a frozen state of fear.  Handwriting has also been a struggle.  So, I try to find the learning potential in any situation to help her as much as possible.  And it's so enjoyable to watch her improve in all areas.  Her reading and handwriting are improving, mostly due to the extra help she's received from a dear friend and learning expert, Mr. D.  He's encouraged her to use learning strategies to help her stay focused and better track the words on the page.  I don't time her fact tests every time.  I let her lie on the floor to finish her math.  She sits on the futon to practice her reading or spelling.  We dance around and sing a lot.  If she wants to play with toothpicks in the kitchen with her brother, that's fine with me.  On her own she practiced counting out a hundred toothpicks...for fun! 

I have noticed that when the television and the computer are off, the kids can easily find constructive and educational things to do.  (Of course they fight and drive each other crazy, but that's educational, too.)  I am as guilty as any other parent of using electronic devices as free baby-sitting, but I'm trying more and more to encourage unplugged time.  Their play is fascinating to watch.  They can be different cartoon characters, act out stories with cars and trains, pretend to be a vet or a policeman (or woman!), act like animals, or pretend to be hurt or unhappy and have things "fixed" again.  I want my kids to stay kids as long as possible.  And I truly feel that constructive and creative play is one of the best ways to help my kids wade through the more difficult (and sometimes frustrating) educational "stuff" they need to know in life (math facts, what an adverb modifies, how a silent final e works, etc.)  So, at our house, sometimes we're working, and sometimes we're playing.  But we're always learning. 

 

Play is often talked about as if it were relief from serious learning.  But for children play is serious learning.  Play is really the work of childhood.  ~Fred Rogers